Excited to be doing another set of our bespoke hanging wall frames for @johnwardlearchitects to display their work on as they open a Sydney office in the new year. An absolute pleasure to work with such talented people. Swipe left to see how these guys will look when finished.
After the day I almost died, I died many times over.
I couldn't understand what was happening anymore, my logical self tried to analyze the situation & explain it to this being that had settled down in me, & now controlled my thoughts & feelings. Everyone tried to reason with me. Funny, how could they not know that the greatest voice of reason was mine?
My inner me pleading, reeling my Blessings off mental fingers, “But I'm so Blessed…a loving husband, sweet son, amazing family, in-laws turned family, great job, supportive colleagues, a good life …& now the daughter I badly wanted. June, what is wrong with you??”. But alas, controller’s voice drowned it all out, mocking my reason, laser-focused on the dismal now…”You almost died. If you fall asleep, you will die. Come to think of it, why is your tongue falling into your throat choking you awake when you do fall asleep? The baby is crying non-stop…Ah you cannot take care of her O, your milk has refused to come in, ordinary feeding you cannot even feed the child, of what use are you? This heavy bleeding, will it stop, why so chunky & heavy? But – why are you so so weak? Mba-Mba - You are surely going to die. And this your pain– is it normal sef, maybe they cut something inside they were not meant to..Or😲..did they leave a pair of scissors inside you, because why are you bleeding like this? It’s not normal. If you sleep you will die...”.
I spent those days in my brain, nothing outside held any interest for me anymore. My blood pressure rose to baffling levels, I couldn’t sleep, I was so weak, so tired, I stopped eating, I became tin (worse than thin), I became so quiet, so still, & so small in spirit & body, folding into myself.
Have you ever seen a person racked by depression so total? It is not a pretty sight, & can drive even the most patient carer to lose their own faith.
Fear is a spirit, a spirit is a being, and if you allow this being take over, you are forever lost. I was lost.
I had to reach deep, very deep within the recesses of my very being, my very soul, my sunken belly, to find the last shreds of sanity, and squeeze out the tearful, fervent, desperate prayer that started me on my healing.
Well on our way to having a dog-proof 🤞 garbage cabinent.
For those of you who haven't been following along; our pups figured out how to get into our tall, pedaled garbage can. Somehow they can get the trash out without tipping the thing over! I'm sure it is a team effort between both dogs and the kitty 😼, as there's gotta be some craftiness involved. We didn't have the space under a counter to put the trash can so we had to think outside the box -- hellooo Pinterest!
There were quite a few plans available but we try and do the majority of our projects with reclaimed materials. I "roughed" out an idea and took to the re-stores. We ended up using an old bookshelf, a funky wooden box, some leftover MDF flooring panels, scrap wood, and some hindges and drawer sliders all from the Habitat for Humanity Surplus store. Tomorrow I'll touch up paint and once that is done it'll just be one (or 2?) drawer pulls away from fully functional!